LuAnn 的个人资料Insights照片日志列表更多  |  工具 帮助 |
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2月22日 Sense of SelfI'm not sure what it is this year but I seem to have lost my sense of self. I've pretty much always known what I've wanted in life, what drove me and what stopped me. Lately though I can't seem to get a read on what excites me anymore. One day turns into the next and I can't even muster up the energy to get excited enough to wander out to the mailbox.
Even writing about this is hard because I don't know just what it is I need to write! Have you ever felt like the world took a sharp turn in the night and when you woke up you had no idea where you were? That's about how I feel.
I grew up in the Midwest in an area too small to be designated anything. I lived next door to a farm. I rode a bike for summer excitement and waded in the creek on hot days with my friends. I was brought up saying 'please' and 'thank you' as well as 'yes, ma'am' and 'yes, sir' and never thought anything about it. There was no throwing the finger or putting your palm up in someone's face in disrespect. When an adult told you to do something, you did it. You respected your neighbors and lent a hand before it was asked of you.
I now live in an area where you don't know your neighbors and probably don't want to. Words said in your direction you would not repeat. If you look like you might need assistance, you'd better be aware of your defenses because you just might need them. Anything worth doing is going to cost you something in the two digit starting range.
I sound tired, old, and bitter, but I'm not really. I'm just wondering when it all changed and why. I know that this is not the way I raised my children and that they don't act this way today. What happened to the 'love' generation of the sixties and seventies? Where is all the acceptance and embracing of our differences? It seems that the more we embraced each other the more we have annoyed each other. Could it be that the novelty has worn off and we now see the cracks rather than the mystique?
All I know is I need a little mystique in my life again. A little something to pique my curiousity and get my spirit speaking to me one more time.
2月3日 QuietQuiet. What is quiet? An order barked out when someone is tired of yelling over the noise of disinterested people carrying on their own discussions? The lack of noise echoing through your home from the nearby highway? A television or boombox that is mysteriously silent?
What about the calm that spreads over your body when you finally come to that stage right before you drift off to sleep? Or how about that quiet that seeps into your soul when you've finally reached that point in your life when you no longer strive to be that superperson you always thought you wanted to be.
Quiet is a word that many of us seem to crave but rarely find in our busy lives. Why is this? Could it be the ever present cell phones, computers, cars, schedules, and jobs that fill our hours with things to do and places to go? We have more labor saving devices that all the other generations combined, yet we have less quiet than ever. We have less quiet moments in which to use our free time and therefore less quiet in our minds and hearts.
Could it be that we are using these devices to avoid the quiet moments? Are we afraid that if we have them we are missing out on something more exciting? Something that might make us something more than we already are. And if so, how will we know which we need to do and which to let pass?
We need those quiet moments in which to reflect on who we are as individuals. How can we know if we are headed in the right direction if we never slow down enough to hear our own thoughts and dreams? We fill our hours fulfilling obligations to others, making their dreams come true and yet, we deny coming to know our own. Why is that?
We've been taught that we have to live up to certain standards, which some of us will clearly never make. Why? If everyone could make them they wouldn't be worth attaining! Whose standards are they anyway? If they are not yours, why are you judging yourself by them?
Everyone should have quiet moments in their day to day lives. It resets the clock and allows us to gain back our dreams, our realities, and allows us the chance to take back our lives. It is our due in a life that only comes around once and should be lived as honestly as can be to our true selves. We should never be afraid to be alone with ourselves and our thoughts. It is the only true time that we can hear the truth about ourselves if we just listen to our hearts and not the voices outside.
2月2日 The WhisperThe whisper, a sound that brings more heated arguments to a close than the loudest roar. Have you ever tried to win an argument with someone who insists on believing that they can win simply by screaming at you? The more you try to talk over them to listen to you, the louder and more insistant they become. Fighting them on their level only makes them stronger. They feed on the discord. They figure that if they say it loud enough and long enough you will believe it, too.
But the lowly little whisper, just above hearing level, makes them come down to your level. Ever try to maintain anger at a whisper? It's difficult as it takes so much attention to hear what is being said that your body starts to calm down, draining the anger from you. If you whisper to an opponent, you are letting the wind out of the windbag, so to speak.
Whispers make you look at a person. It is harder to hear so you watch their face to help decode what is being said. If you maintain a nonconfrontational face while whispering, you are also diffusing a key component in an argument. Since most arguments are born out of fear, distrust, or discord a neutral or friendly face paired with a lower voice can help to bring the two of you back to a calm situation.
Whispers also bring you closer to the other person simply because of the volume of your voice. They will have to get closer to you to hear, step into your space and acknowledge you're speaking. With the right amount of respect in your voice and mannerisms the situation brings you more back to equals and a less frightening/threatening environment.
Whispers can be destructive though when abused. We've all been the victim of viscious rumors, spoken in hushed tones until you catch them in the act and they're suddenly hushed. The most viscious weapon in all the world is the human tongue when it tells rumors, spreads lies. That is why we have to protect the power of whispers and use them for good. Words, once spoken, can never be erased.
Children know the value of whispers. I think we all did at one point, but have forgotten as we grew up and ran into those who abused them for their own personal gain. Children love the sweet tickle of whispers breathed into their ears. They love the closeness of a shared moment as you whisper something to them that only they can hear. Even a small child will stop crying when you share a whisper with them.
The whisper. So strong for such a small thing. Maybe we all need refresher courses in whisper therapy. Maybe children should be our therapists as they have such a less jaded sense of the world. Besides, their whispers are the breathy kind that brings such tickles....
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